inspiration

a month or so ago, i discovered pinterest through a blog i follow.  the blogger had posted a link to an image of a dancer and i wanted to discover where the picture had come from because it was beautiful.  it had been posted by this pinterest pinner (is pinner the right word?).  the photos she (?) has collected are inspiring and i found myself browsing through them again this afternoon.  it constantly amazes me how many emotions can be communicated in a single photograph.

i have a photograph sitting below my computer screen at work as of late yesterday afternoon.  it is a picture of the small person currently growing in me whose heart beats three times as fast as mine.  i'm excited to meet this small person in june.

sleeping

found this here

i have been sleeping "like a rock on sleeping pills" lately, but mountains appear to be moving while i'm awake. work is going in full force.  i am engaged in and enjoying what i am doing.  i have just finished peak mileage and am now tapering for a 50k next week, probably the last one i do for the year.  i was called as a leader for the young women at church.

last night in the car on the way to drop one of the young women off, i was asked to tell them something unique about myself.  i started generally describing what i do and the 8th grader sitting next to me turned sharply and said, you're a scientist?  i said yes and told her more about what i did.  we talked about running and dancing and karate.  and then she asked if i new much about astronomy.  i said no, but i know astronomers and could try to arrange for her to meet them.  she told me she wants to be an astronomer and dreams of being surrounded by scientists.  i told her being surrounded by scientists is an amazing thing and told her about a program she could do in high school that would surround her with scientists.  and then we arrived at her house.

as we were pulling away, the other leader in car turned to me and said, that was amazing.  apparently this young lady doesn't normally talk very much.  i believe i met a kindred spirit last night and i believe that she will move mountains.

happy trails and new projects

my feet flew like eagles

my heart knew no boundaries

my spirit dreamed that the trail would never end

~from an email signature of another runner on the trail running list

we survived the earthquake and the hurricane.  the weekend of the latter turned out to be an excellent time to get the sewing machine working, so many months after its arrival.  i turned a pair of women's size 24 calf-length linen pants into a skirt that fit me (many sizes smaller).  i need to pick up some backing to put a few embroidery touches on the front.

we also survived the baltimore grand prix...by escaping to shenandoah national park for a couple nights of camping.  it is beautiful there!  we hiked and ran, made smores, learned about the history of the park and even got to spend a few moments reading in the rocking chairs at one of the lodges.  we arrived home to only have to put up with 24 hours of indy cars racing past our street.  

on labor day, we labored.  we went through those bags and boxes that weren't unpacked and had all the random odds, ends and papers tossed in them.  we cleaned.  i mended, baked, read and stretched.  my next project is to make a braided rug for our living room.  hopefully i will be able to take pictures though as i lost my camera in colorado!

earthquakes and hurricanes, oh my!

earlier this week we had an earthquake and now we waiting to see whether or not a hurricane will hit us this weekend.  this is enough to leave one distracted and rather unproductive at work.  i find myself wanting instead to be helping prepare our home and our friends homes for anything that may come our way this weekend.

i reaching a certain concentration low, i decided that i needed to write down goals that i had for postdoc in the next two years.  this at least helped me re-gain my focus for a period and start delving into the medical literature to see what i could find out about how we control our gait.  it is amazing how much we learn not from studying healthy people but from studying people who have disordered movements.

my stomach was a little disordered last weekend.  i ended up struggling up hope pass again this year and missed the time cutoff at the 50-mile mark by 22 minutes.  this meant i had to stop running.  again, i don't think i'd had enough calories, but i had done a great well enough with my hydration.  i have been kind of bummed out this week, but i think that partially has to do with the fact that i'm recovering and not getting as much exercise as normal...so its probably withdrawal that's making me sad rather than the race itself.  i will finish eventually.

the plus side to this finish status, if you choose to look at it this way, was that eric and i found ourselves with a a free day in breckenridge that we had not been expecting.  we were able to go on a short hike in the mountains (that was all my recovering legs could take) and time to just enjoy being outside and in breck.  we are plotting ways to move there.  unfortunately, my camera seems to have been misplaced so i don't have pictures to share from the race or from breck.  hopefully i will find it soon!

from the mountains

we are in the mountains.  i love the profound stillness that exists here.  eric has quickly taken a liking to the mountains in colorado, much to my pleasure.

my race is on saturday.  i'm drinking water like there is no tomorrow and managing to stay somewhat hydrated.  we have to pick up a few things tomorrow and go to medical check-in in the morning (they measure our blood pressure, weight, oxygen saturation, etc, so they have a baseline for comparison if we need medical attention) followed by racer orientation.  after that i will commence making my ume musubis and finish the instructions for my crew and pacers.  the weather is perfect.

i am trying to embrace my nervousness.  i am getting lost in my own thoughts a lot staring at the mountains and visualizing the trails.  i am on familiar ground and excited yet scared that i will make mistakes like i did last time.  some of the cut off times have become more strict.  if i have a good day these won't be issues with this, but the reality of this race is that you don't know what you're going to have to deal with physiologically, environmentally, etc, until you start running on race morning.  that is part of what makes leadville such a great adventure though. 

i will try to post some pictures of the mountains here soon.

heat wave

we have been having a bit of a heat wave here on the east coast.  naturally, the air conditioning for half of our house broke at the end of last week, and lucky for us, our room is on the 3rd floor of the house.  temperatures in our room were in the 90s for most of the weekend.  we slept in the empty basement room (which was at least 20 degrees cooler) on saturday night because it was too hot.  last night though the new housemate had moved in and we were confronted with a night in our room again.  i opened the door that leads out onto our small patio just to remind myself that it was hotter outside than in, but what i discovered was a very nice breeze.  in fact, it felt cooler outside than in our room.  so last night we opened the three large windows in the front of the house and the door in the back (our room with its bathroom and closet takes up the whole 3rd floor), let the ceiling fan run and discovered that, though warm, it was actually quite pleasant in our room.  the breeze and fresh air were lovely.

we move into our new (permanent) place on wednesday.  it will be nice to have everything out of storage and not be living out of a suitcase.  i am excited to play the piano (keyboard) and not have to fight for space in the refrigerator.  and the timing of the move is perfect to find anything i think i might use for leadville next month and take it with me this weekend.

saturday will be my last long training run before leadville--50 miles.  i hope to test some more nutrition ideas.  we had to fill out medical forms this weekend for the race which is bringing home how soon it really is.  i was perusing the leadville 100 website and discovered why i should be glad i did not go out for training camp this year...snow.  there was so much of it that it was not safe to run part of the course and on another section they had to "make" trail through the snow to be able to run it.  i am wondering what this bodes, if anything, for next month.  i wonder how high the water will be in the stream crossings, how cold the air temperature will be and if it will snow.  racing in the cold is a different animal from racing in the heat, so i know that no matter how much i train, there will probably still be some things i am learning or experimenting with while i'm racing.  i suspect this is why so many people tell me that "life" is training for these races--doing things when you're hungry, tired, cold, hot and sore while doing your best to keep your attitude positive and your body in forward motion.  i am excited though to say the least.

movement

"The body was designed to move and movement is the great elixir of life. Where there is lack of movement life becomes stagnant and stale. Human life is a mind/body event. Simply put, what you think affects your body and what you do with your body affects your thinking. So if you wish to improve or change the output of this continuum you are best served by addressing both."

~Author Unknown

I thought this was beautiful. Movement is a very powerful thing.

bonjour!

i decided that at least one of my pictures should have me in it to prove that i am in fact here in belgium and taking these pictures. we had a "light" day at the conference. i went to one of the keynote lectures and then, set off in search of food that didn't involve french fries, mussels or mayonaise (i wonder if belgians really do eat them all together as we're told or if they just tell the tourists they do and then laugh when said tourists are not looking).

no, i wanted something less heavy and something that my body was more used to digesting...so i went in search of belgian vegan food. about a block from the lovely arch above sits the little restaurant and store pictured below.

i grabbed a to-go lunch full of all sorts of different veggies with all sorts of spice combinations i had never had before. most were winners but i wasn't a fan of whatever was on the artichoke. i ate in the sun on a lovely little bench in the park on the other side of the arch.

when i finished lunching, i continued on my self-guided tour of brussels and happened upon this:

brussels is the captial of europe. i wandered around the streets checking out all the e.u. headquarters buildings. outside of one of them was the following story:

aside from the gender confusion, i think we need more teachers like him/her. that teacher makes me want to learn too.

that and my experiences reading the other signs about the history of the e.u. brought home needing to learn a bit more about world history (exercised my freedom of choice and elected to not take that course in high school!).

my tour then led me through the rain to central station and then to the grand place for a tasty late afternoon waffle break. i saw the palais, a church that appeared to be on the palais compound and then did a lot of window shopping as i wound my way back to my hotel.

i am happily sitting down now.

belgium

there are lots of lovely walkways in brussels. the weather here has been sunny and very pleasant given the heat of maryland at present.

i gave my talk, poster presentation and co-chaired a session at the conference today. late afternoon i decided that was enough work for one day and it was time to go play tourist. i headed towards the grand place and enroute stumbled upon st. michael's church. the stained glass was amazing. the above picture is the organ, which seemed to be floating in air and which sounded incredible echoing through the space.

i arrived in the grand place to discover that the square was being overtaken. the police informed us that a "medieval spectacle" was taking place that evening. there were grandstands set up and people walking around in tights and puffy hats looking like they just came from a graduation ceremony (they were in costume). hundreds of people filled the square as evening went on.

i was kind of stalking this guy when i realized what he was doing. when i walked into the square, there was music playing and a beautiful, but kind of eery? voice singing. it was perfect for the location. i stood there listening for awhile taking it all in with all of the other tourists milling about...and then i noticed someone who appeared to be wearing a microphone. this was the guy singing. they were testing his microphone settings and he was walking about the square amongst the tourists singing, but he would put his head down so unless you paid close attention he looked like everyone else. a few other people started noticing though and also stopped to listen. the square is all stone and surrounded by taller buildings. the acoustics are amazing. it was incredible to just stand and listen.

i have two more days left of conference time. i am thoroughly enjoying it but hoping i will be able to take some time to explore brussels a bit more while i'm here...and maybe eat more than just belgian dark chocolate and fresh baguettes!

eat more fruit!

all of my reading lately has led me to the conclusion that i should be eating more fruit and less dessert. in theory i already knew this, but sometimes it takes a few scary statistics to drive it home. this morning i went to a (relatively) nearby organic farm to pick fruit (note: i had been planning to do this independent of any scary statistics. berry picking is so much fun!). this was the first day they were open for the pick-your-own season and the bushes were bending over because they were so heavy with berries.

they gave me a bucket and pointed me to a field. i was enjoying myself so much i just kept going until the bucket was full (5lbs of blueberries!). afterward i went to another section of the farm for red and black raspberries. the best part was you could eat while you picked. yum!

so this is what $20 of fresh picked organic berries looks like. i froze a bunch of the blueberries for future smoothies.

prior to berry picking i also stopped by the farmers market (its amazing how much time you have on saturday morning of a recovery week in training!). lots of greens were to be seen. i'm excited to watch the market develop as the summer progresses and more fruits and veggies ripen.

koshari

i made myself some delicious koshari for dinner this evening. koshari comes from egypt and is a mix of noodles, rice, lentils, a spicy tomato sauce and crispy, browned onions. mine had a little bit of a twist to it though. i ran out of pasta noodles so instead i used mung bean (cellophane) noodles. it looked a little different but tasted great all the same. i used this recipe for the proportions and sauce and now have leftovers for a week.

my body seems to be slowly adjusting to getting up earlier again. it helps that it is light outside at 5:30a, which was definitely not the case in austin when i left. i have been ready for a nap around 10a though, which isn't good when i have seminars and meetings. a major clinical trial for preventing falls in the elderly is about to start in our department and i'm getting to sit in on the meetings. its definitely getting me excited about changes in balance as we age. based on what i see from ultrarunning alone (though i know people who are finishing up clinical trials with it as well), exercise definitely seems to have a role in maintaining balance. i am hoping to be able to explore more about what exactly that role is.

room with a view

i just finished moving into the room i'll be in until late july. the picture above is the view from the balcony at the back of my room. yes, the water that you see is the inner harbor. i'm actually only about 4 blocks from a couple marinas and do shorter runs along the docks.

i made a last minute trip to nyc this weekend to visit rob and britt. i arrived in penn station and went straight to a benefit concert in a loft to see rob and britt's friend's band...and reggie watts showed up to perform next! but that was only friday night. the weekend was packed, but relaxing. we brunched. we walked. we cabbed. i ran. we found a great bookstore. we ate vegan food. we danced with hipsters in williamsburg, brooklyn until 2a. we visited a legit bakery (why are these only found on the east coast?). we strolled in central park and crossed 5th ave through the middle of the puerto rican parade. the only thing missing was eric. i am looking forward to going back to visit with him when he finishes school!

today was my first day at work. i am excited to be (formally) working again. in between taking care of all the fun logistical things, i am going through papers figuring out what experiments i want to do next. partially inspiring my thoughts at the moment is healthy at 100, which i just started reading. it provides an overview of 4 cultures that are known for having elders that live (abundantly) in their 100s. i have been thinking lately that next i may want to focus on elderly populations in general and issues of balance and posture during walking. hopefully i will be able to formulate a few questions to answer over the next couple months!

c & o towpath

this morning i headed west to do my long run on the c & o towpath. it was beautiful and green and unpaved (!). i ran past great falls, many old locks and even more people. i saw the scariest beaver ever (and now respect the attempt mit athletics made a few years ago to have a intimidating beaver mascot), numerous cranes and a very large spider. when i finished, i ate the tastiest fresh peach ever.

baltimore!

last week was an exciting week. fortunately our road trip was much less exciting than the 48 hours before we left and we arrived safely in baltimore on saturday. we spent the rest of the weekend and first couple days of this week on a mini-vacation in baltimore and dc. being in arlington cemetery on memorial day was an incredibly moving experience and definitely made me more fully realize the importance of the holiday.

i am settling into my new place in baltimore. i'm temporarily in a room different from the one i'll be living in for the next 7 weeks, but when i move, i will post a picture of the view...i can see the harbor from the deck outside the room. its beautiful! eric and i were able to sign the lease for the apartment we're renting before he left. we're scheduled to move in there in late july. it will be nice for both of us to move into it at the same time.

i have been enjoying all of the fun things i had forgotten about in the 8 years since i last lived on the east coast--humidity, bob evans, bertuccis, trader joes, farmers markets that are cheap, speeding, proximity to everything. that said, today, my first full day in baltimore by myself, i spent mostly around the house catching up on all of the emails and work i haven't been doing for the last week or so while traveling...like sending preferred dates, etc, to the travel agent who is arranging my flight for my conference in brussels at the beginning of next month and finishing my hiring paperwork so i can be paid when i start my new job!

and in my spare time, i've been studying trails in the area. yesterday i went hiking for an hour in oregon ridge park and drove past loch raven reservoir which is supposed to have a solid 10 mile loop around it. i'm planning to head to the c&o trail on saturday morning for my long run. hopefully the weather forecast is correct and it cools off a bit!

long run

a finance blog i follow had a link to seth godin's blog today. a recent blog post of his was entitled how long is your long run? my mind immediately jumped to, well, my long run last weekend was just over 20 miles with 2 mile intervals throughout...and then i clicked on the link and realized he was not necessarily literally referring to a long run. oops.

my blog roll recently has been filled with discussions of frugality and stretching one's budget as we prepare to move to maryland, where cost of living is more expensive and where we be working on one income for a bit. i'm actually quite excited for the challenge. one of the things we have been struggling with recently is finding a place in our price range that's (a) not a closet and (b) in a reasonably safe area. the twist here is that we are doing this from austin. a couple weekends ago we were out in baltimore to look in-person, but ever since, we have been relying on some new friends to go check out places for us after we have pre-screened through photos, emails and phone calls. padmapper is one of my new favorite websites. we think we might have found a place in a very cute neighborhood called ridgley's delight (think historic 3-story rowhouses lining narrow, cobblestone streets). keep your fingers crossed!

cycling in style

i had a bit off a rough commute home today. it was gorgeous outside and a lovely day to be on bike. and then i almost got taken out by a women in a white suv (and she realized it too when she finally bothered to look). i was experimenting with a new idea of taking the sidewalk the last ~0.3 miles to my apartment (you have to cross a highway and then make a left into my apartment complex which is trickier than it sounds given the hill also there). two cars (one right after the other) both with drivers on cell phones blocked my way as i was trying to cross the side (usually not busy) entrance to a plaza...then the guy immediately behind then, not on a cell phone but who did appear to see me, also pulls up and blocks my path. i decided after all of this that i would stick to riding in the bike lane and making all the traffic slow down so i can turn left into my complex.

the point of this is that i got home and was rather annoyed. so i decided to look up articles about commuting and how to practice being zen when commuting and the drivers around you are impatient (and clearly not paying attention). well, i happened upon some very fun links (see for example: riding pretty or chic cyclists). that made me happy about bicycle commuting again and provide the additional challenge of doing it in style...maybe even in heels!

i'm excited to get to explore a new city on a bike soon. i was reading this article, which highlights some of the differences between cycling here versus in europe, including the difference in driver-cyclist relationship. i am wondering if i could maybe explore brussels by bicycle in july (even if for only a day) when i'm there for my conference.

happy cycling!

passed!

its been a busy last month! the most recent news is that i passed my dissertation defense last friday...and it wasn't because my committee members were playing an april fools joke on me! the defense went well. after getting over a fear that began the morning of that i would have a brain dump of everything i had learned in the last 4 years 5 seconds into my talk, every thing went smoothly. there was some good discussion with my committee members and then the asked me to leave the room so they could discuss amongst themselves whether i should pass or not. about 5 minutes later they invited me back in to tell me that i passed!

now i have to wrap up odds and ends--get a few forms signed and make a some corrections to the text of my dissertation...and then there's that whole bit about getting all the knowledge in my head about lab equipment bequeathed to other people. i'm the only one who knows how to use some things!

eric and i decided to move to the washington dc area. i'll be starting a postdoc in june at the university of maryland and am very excited about it. i'm extremely excited to be closer to family too. since college, i've never lived within a few hour drive of so many aunts, uncles, cousins and even a sibling! i'm looking forward to seeing people more often and getting to know everyone better. i'm also looking forward to exploring the dc area more. i only visited museums and such as a kid and eric has only passed through for a brief period as well...there's a bike trail that goes 187 miles from dc to cumberland (?)...i could do a point to point 50 mile training run on a (paved--maybe there's dirt on the side?) trail--multiple times!

this past week, the weather in texas finally hit the mid- to upper-90s in temperatures. its summer folks. i am writing this morning as my run has been temporarily canceled due to a rather large thunder and lightning storm. its weird though because i can still hear birds chirping just outside the window.

focus

the last sections of my dissertation were due to my advisor on monday. this week i've been working on edits to the next to last section and beginning to prepare slides for the seminar i'm giving next friday at the university of maryland.

life has definitely slipped quietly into workaholic mode. i expected this. my defense is 4 weeks from tomorrow and the dissertation itself is due to my committee one week from monday. i'm actually really looking forward to spring break because i will have just submitted everything to said committee. writing has actually been enjoyable. it has stopped me from doing more and more and caused me to pause and reflect on the data i have, what it means and where its moving my field. its also caused me to realize how much i've matured (and how far i still have to go!) as a scientist.

we still have no idea where we'll end up later this year or even this summer. the only thing on the schedule is august 20-21, when i will be running 100 miles in the rocky mountains during my second attempt at leadville.

calla lilies

eric got me calla lilies for valentine's day. i was setting my water glass down during breakfast this morning and a drop of water fell on my hand. i looked a little closer and discovered that the lilies were crying! some of the flowers and leaves had a single, small droplet of water precariously hanging from their tips. the beauty of detail!

april 1

will be a day to remember. my dissertation defense is now officially scheduled for 1p on april fools day. i hope my committee will keep the jokes about not passing to a minimum!

exciting week!

my advisor gave me the go-ahead at the end of last week to email my committee this week to set up my dissertation defense. i sent out the email earlier today and am waiting on one more committee member to email me his schedule. its looking like my defense might fall on april fools day. mentally i will have to begin preparing myself for april fools jokes involving failing my defense.

the job search is going well otherwise. i've had a phone interview with one university about a postdoc and am heading out there to give the department seminar talk on march 11. i was contacted last week by another university and asked for permission to call my references. they said they would be in touch about a phone interview soon. that is for a tenure-track faculty position in a department of health and human performance. i'm leaving out details (such as university names) for now until i'm a bit farther along in the process. it is amazing how quickly being faced with real jobs will change your perspective or awareness of what you do. all of a sudden i need to be prepared to answer questions about how much money and space i would need too set up a lab. that's not really something you learn in graduate school, but are kind of expected to know to start your own lab.

i feel like i'm going to be giving lots of 45 min to 1 hour long talks about my research in march though between interviewing and being "voluntold" to give a talk in the kinesiology department movement science seminar here. practice for my actual defense is good! an abstract i submitted for a conference in late april also recently got expected for a talk as well. i was pretty happy about that as they had something like a 32% acceptance rate for talks (that's not very high) because they had so many submissions for the conference.

in running news, i finally went and got checked out by a pt. she's actually another phd student in the kines department here but her "real job" is being the director of physical therapy at the austin branch of a sports performance center. she thought it was cool that i did 50 mile races, which is a much appreciated clinician characteristic that i find rather infrequently. on a completely unrelated note, it was rather amusing when two of the other pts who worked there took one look at my legs and commented about how i must be a triathlete. after a week of not doing anything (and i mean anything) because of my knee (oddly, not doing anything made it feel worse) and feeling rather out of shape, their comments were appreciated. back to the injury assessment though, cp, the pt, started by asking what was wrong. i told her and then added that i had been reading a book about back pain and realized that a lot of what i might be experiencing in my leg might be psychosomatic (i.e. anxiety manifesting itself physically). after checking me for everything from arthritis to meniscal and labral tears to lack of muscle flexibility and i tested negative for everything. she then looked at me and said, i think you're right. she recommended someone to do a couple sessions of deep tissue massage to make some of my muscles stop tensing up and then warned me that it would probably make me cry. i'm waiting to hear back from the massage therapist about setting up a time. i ran last night and this morning though for a bit and felt great. so the bottom line is that i'm fine, just a little tense...possibly with the few other things that are going on in my life right now. go figure.

i think it is (more than) worth mentioning the book i talked about above. its called 'healing back pain' by dr. john sarno. i picked the book up because it was referenced in another book i was recently reading, and remembering the back pain i had in college, thought the book might be worth a read if only to tuck the knowledge away in my head for a rainy day. the book does talk about back pain, but more importantly it talks about the variety of ways anxiety and anger can "appear" in us physically when we choose to ignore them--back pain, headaches, stomach issues and various other muscle and tendon related afflictions--and how these manifestations tend to not respond long-term to treatment very well, namely because the treatment is for symptoms not cause. the book is about 185 pages and a very quick read. i would definitely recommend it in general and specifically to anyone who has weird muscle pain and can't figure out what's causing it. the ideas in the book will, at the very least, give you another aspect of wellness to consider when treating injuries.

i'm hoping for another snow day tomorrow, but i'm not sure that it will happen this time. either way, i hope everyone has a great friday!

why, hello winter!

i had forgotten what you were like. my husband was teasing me the other day, reminding me that i grew up in ohio and then lived in boston and that because of this the current 20 degree temperatures in austin should not bother me too much. well, regardless of wear you live, 20 degrees is cold. i haven't ridden my bike to work all week because its been in the upper teens and low 20s at the time i leave for work. i haven't yet figured out how to keep my hands warm with these temperatures, though apparently i haven't forgotten too much about layering otherwise though.

one of the faculty positions i applied for is in montana, and out of curiosity, i have been watching the weather forecast there lately too, just to see what winter temperatures are like. today, the windchill map of the country on weather.com indicated that it was warmer in montana than in most of texas, and the forecast for parts of montana today are actually warmer than the forecast for austin. we were on rolling blackouts yesterday for electricity and today the university is sending out emails informing us that they're watching the weather but to keep checking the webpage for updates on whether or not the university will close. kind of crazy.

small chain ring commute

during my last race, i tripped and aggravated my IT band by proceeding to run 43 more miles. it took several weeks for it to feel normal again, but in the mean time my other IT band got aggravated. i haven't properly rehab-ed the other side though and this has come back to haunt me as lately its been very tight. i have cut back on the running and decided that i would also try only cycling in my small chain ring so that i'm not straining it too much by non-running activities. riding only in the small chain ring slowed my daily 7.5 mile commute to campus down a little bit this morning. that said, i arrived at work less annoyed at people in cars than normal. i liked that. i think i may stick with this slowing down thing.

though it is not necessarily reflected on my blog, i have been writing a lot the last couple weeks. i finished first drafts for the last two chapters of my dissertation and this week i'm working on edits to another one. when i send my advisor my revised draft tomorrow, i will commence editing the introduction to my dissertation. i'm actually enjoying writing at the moment because i'm getting to sit back and think more thoroughly about the meaning of my results. i feel fortunate that my job doesn't entail doing exactly the same thing everyday. at any given time i am somewhere in the brainstorm-propose-experiment-analyze-writepapertobepublished process, but fortunately, i'm constantly repeating this process with new data and new questions. this works out well because when i get sick of coding, its time to write. when i get sick of writing, its time to read, and when i get sick of that, its time to find subjects and interact with people again! (ironically, following this chain, when i get sick of people, i code again...hm) at this point, i'm thinking that my defense will end up being in april...which means my dissertation will leave my hands and head to my committee in just over a month. its a good thing i'm enjoying writing because there's a lot to do!

on a completely different note, i just finished reading two interesting books. one was called 'harvest for hope' by jane goodall. part of the reason i find her fascinating is because i've been to gombe stream national park in tananzia where she did all her chimpanzee research. to me, it was a magical place. her book reflects on the state of food production in the world, with a lot of references to what is currently happening in the united states. while she tries to remain hopeful, much of the book has a rather bleak outlook (warranted or not), unfortunately. she definitely supports the case for eating local organic food. if you've never read anything in this area (none of michael pollan's books, for example), you might find this interesting.

the other book i finished was 'how to live well without a car' by chris balish. in many ways i hope to be able to live without a car at some point and rely on walking and biking to get places. the book did cause me to reflect, but not necessarily in the way i would have thought. the author makes suggestions about moving to within a certain distance of work, for example, so that you can get to work without your car and about how you can grocery shop on a bike. i had never really thought of issues like this in the way he expressed them; i had simply gone out and done them because they fit with my lifestyle. so it was interesting to have someone else point out other reasons for adopting habits i already had and to have a few more suggestions of things to try that are already along the lines of my appreciation for walking and biking everywhere. if nothing else, i suppose the book has inspired me to enjoy my 7.5 mile commute to campus even when its cold because at least i am in touch with nature and not stuck in traffic on the freeway!

brussels

i've been writing a lot this week, though not as much for the blog. i finished the first draft of another chapter to my dissertation. one chapter and an intro and conclusion for everything left to write. my goal is to have the draft of the last chapter done before the end of the month. i've set a pretty aggressive timeline for myself writing-wise, but i would like to graduate this semester. the last of my recommendations for faculty positions went in yesterday...so now i am waiting to hear back on everything job-related and keeping my eyes out for any other postdocs that come out this spring that look interesting.

last week, i also put together the first of two abstracts for the international society of biomechanics meeting this summer. it will be held in brussels, belgium in early july. assuming the abstracts are accepted i plan to be heading to europe for a bit this summer!

the weather here has been helping make all this writing happen efficiently (and the time waiting to hear about jobs pass quickly). its been in the 30s and raining. my hands have been numb as i've been biking to work sometimes because its been so cold. i could take the car, but there is something about heading to work by bike or foot that i really enjoy. i was sharing this with eric one evening only for it to be followed but a bit of irony. the following evening it was pouring rain and dark outside. though i had lights for my bike, i decided it might just be safer to take the bus home. i waited at the bus stop for 35 minutes at which point, i saw the bus turn the corner a block down the street...bypassing the bus stop entirely! i waited a few minutes longer to see if the bus would go around the block and come back and get us, but it didn't. the bus only comes once every 40 minutes (i can bike home in less time than that) so instead of waiting for the next one i walked a couple miles down the street and met eric for dinner. the next morning i ran to campus to pick up my bike. the weather ended up being worse than it had been the previous evening and i arrived home, with my bike, soaking wet and freezing. i guess i should have just ridden home in the first place!

cheap

i just finished reading cheap by ellen ruppel shell. i highly recommend it although i'm not sure i will shop the same way again. the author examines discount culture in america, how it affects our economy, how it affects works rights, how it affects product quality and more.

my head is spinning with reflections on how it all fits in with my life. its especially timely as i am finishing up school and possibly will start making more money than i do now. i feel lucky that eric and i are on the same page when it comes to investing in quality products--be it food, clothes or what have you. he doesn't look at me like i have two left eyes when i say i want to try something new, which will invariably affect him as well.

in completely unrelated news, i have begun writing the last chapters of my dissertation. i figure if i write just a few pages a day i will be done in a few weeks...and then it will be a matter of editing text and changing figures. sometimes its difficult to sit down and concentrate on actually writing, but when i get going the words seem to simply flow out of me.

minimalism

i have recently been meditating on actually DOING things and how at some point we have to stop being formally trained and just start learning as we go. i didn't start playing the piano again in theory. i had to actually start playing again to get comfortable with reading the music and getting my hands to move. i had to start playing while people were singing (and hitting a lot of wrong notes) to understand that playing while people are singing is a different animal than practicing or even just playing for others to hear. when i signed up for my first 100-miler, i stopped wanting to do one in theory and started actually preparing for one.

i have been following a number of minimalist and simplicity blogs for the last year and have been reflecting a lot on the choices i make and how my lifestyle does or does not allow me the time and energy to do the things i want. i came across a statement this morning which really seemed to resonate with me. dave bruno of a guy named dave described what he felt the purpose of the 100 Thing Challenge was for him. he wrote:

"The 100 Thing Challenge is about getting out of jail — the prison of American-style consumerism. It’s about breaking free from the shackles of always feeling like we need to get more stuff in order to get to the dream life."

i am not participating in the 100 Thing Challenge, but what struck me about this statement was the second sentence and what happened if you substituted "formal education" for "stuff." don't get me wrong. i like school. i think education is very important. i'm about to finish my phd and i like what i do. however, i have recently been confronted with the search for jobs--faculty positions, postdocs, etc and the fact that while there is a certain type of learning that happens in school, a type of learning of equal value happens outside of academia...or, i suppose, even in academia when you're not a formal student anymore. in other words, only taking classes cannot prepare you for your "dream life."

in academia, faculty are expected to conduct independent research and obtain grant funding. a phd is designed to train you to do this; however you are constantly under the supervision of your advisor(s). the first year or two of a faculty position will probably be accompanied by a very steep learning curve on what it actually means to be a professor, whether or not one starts said position with postdoc experience.

so i suppose the question is, what does "stuff" mean for us individually? is stuff physical stuff that keeps us buying new things and having to have a high-paying job we don't enjoy so we can buy and maintain all that stuff? or is stuff extra degrees we don't really need in order to be able to do what we want and that take our time and money when we could be spending those resources elsewhere?

paperwhites

our apartment complex gave us paperwhites for a holiday gift this year. when we got back after travelling there was a small glass bowl with the bulb in it. it had only a small green sprout. it was supposed to take 4 - 6 weeks to bloom, but our little plant shot up and started blooming in the last couple days. the flowers are small but gorgeous.

service

You never know when someone
May catch a dream for you
You never know when a little word
Or something you may do
May open up the windows
Of a mind that seeks the light
The way you live may not matter at all,
But you never know--it might.

And just in case it could be
That another's life, through you,
Might possibly change for the better
With a broader and brighter view,
It seems it might be worth a try
At pointing the way to the right
Of course, it may not matter at all,
But then again--it might.

--Helen Lowrie Marshall